The new poly book in town

It's finally out! I got my advance copy last night, and I literally can't put it down. If you want down-to-earth practical advice on polyamory, this is the book for you. Forward by Janet Hardy of Ethical Slut fame, and written lucidly and compassionately by Eve Rickert and Franklin Veaux, this is the manual you need for all your poly questions, 101 groups and to give to your parents when you decide to come out. Get online and get your copy today!

Guest post: A Poly Book in the Human Library

A friend of mine recently participated in a local event called the Human Library. Apparently this idea has been catching on for some time, and you can read more about the concept of people as "living books" humanlibrary.org.


Here's what she had to say about her experience as a book about polyamory:

I was part of a human library event that was two days long a couple of weeks ago. The event required me to take a vacation day from work, but it was a vacation to remember, so I am glad to of used the time. First of all some back ground on how it worked. The entrance way to the university library had comfy chairs and side tables where we could all take our readers to talk. We sat in chairs to one side behind a desk where there was a binder of all our book titles and an intro. People would come by and look at the binder and decide who they wanted to know more about.

Topics ranged from California same sex marriage laws to someones experience moving from Ontario to Florida during a tornado... and someones experience of ageism on campus to another who was experiencing what it was like to be a Chinese person come to school in Western Canada ...very diverse. I was by far the most taken out book it turned out. Exhausting! My friend was there for a time also talking about poly but from the intro kind of angle and she left early so I was it for the afternoon.

It was so much fun and so interesting what people wanted to talk about. I was willing to share about my experiences as a mistress/domme, my journey of discovery of my sexuality and my journey to get to where I am today in my poly relationships... most people were into hearing about the latter although there were definite over laps. I talked a lot about my experiences as a younger woman and how I created my goals for family and how I began making my dreams come true... true to me, no one else and how we can all do whatever our creative minds decide... there is room for all of what we want to do, regardless of what it is...

What I found most interesting were the students from abroad that were interested in and thought poly made sense, but didn't know how to normalize it for themselves. Why students from abroad I have no idea. I talked a lot about jealousy too and how to handle it. There were some people that just plain looked confused and defensive and that brought up odd feelings for me as I felt myself feeling less assured that I am "okay" and noticed I started closing down. Instead of doing so I asked them questions and brought out their relationship style and marketed the concept of we are all different. That seemed to work.

It was fascinating to be taken out by people who didn't know me and who were brave enough to engage in a process like that. When they flipped through the book they had no idea who they were going to get when they looked a the assembly of people sitting there. It was a bizarre feeling... we all wore shirts that made us all look the same... they said, "don't judge a book by it's cover" on them. They were all "man" shirts. Very unflattering... heh, seriously though, why can't they make a shirt that is unisex. Could they not of had womens t-shirts made? That was my only complaint.

There is a plan to do this event next year and I will be really excited to do it again... look out for it!

a short poly booklist

Essentials/ones I've read and recommend personally:

Polyamory: The New Love Without Limits : Secrets of Sustainable Intimate Relationships, Deborah M. Anapol

The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities, Dossie Easton and Catherine A. Liszt

Polyamory: Roadmaps for the Clueless & Hopeful, Anthony Ravenscroft

The Polyamory Handbook: A User's Guide, Peter J. Benson

Ones I'd like to read/have had recommended to me:

Spiritual Polyamory, Mystic Life

The Sex and Love Handbook: Polyamory! Bisexuality! Swingers! Spirituality! (& even) Monogamy! A Practical Optimistic Relationship Guide, Kris A. Heinlein and Rozz M. Heinlein
The Lesbian Polyamory Reader: Open Relationships, Non-Monogamy, and Casual Sex, Marcia Munson

Opening Up: A Guide to Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships, Tristan Taormino

Others you might want to consider:

Open: Love, Sex, and Life in an Open Marriage, Jenny Block

The Myth of Monogamy: Fidelity and Infidelity in Animals and People, David P. Barash

The Threesome Handbook: A Practical Guide to SLEEPING WITH THREE, Vicki Vantoch

Better have this handy, in case someone asks...

Stranger in a Strange Land, Robert A. Heinlein